Hands of Time

We all have those moments when the past reaches out and touches us. Sometimes the memory is painful and we hastily brush it aside. Other times we smile and put our head to one side whilst we pause to recall. On occasion the past stands in front of us and will not be ignored. At such moments we are suddenly aware of the fact that TIME passes and we look up to see how the years have fared..

<<>>

That the woman was pregnant was NOT in doubt. Her belly was in danger of busting open right there in the ER room of A&E as the kicks and movements of the baby confined within displayed a yearning desire to rid itself of the barrier that held back the life that was yet to be.

The Mother-to-be grunted in pain from another source. She had been a sufferer of rheumatism for some years and had not really expected that one day this, ‘Miracle that was Life’, would be something she could experience. But her delight was self-evident and she stroked her belly trying to soothe the rage within. Her hands had become at the age of thirty two, something that she now referred to as claws but she used them to great effect as she talked to the baby and continued to stroke her swelling.

Sister explained to me that we needed to get her over to the Labour Ward where she could have her baby in the proper surroundings of a specialist unit. She had been admitted because of an almost severed toe. Alice, the Mum-to-be, had dropped a pair of kitchen scales through her hands and they had landed on her toe which though broken, was now the least of her worries. The loss of blood perhaps or the trauma of the excitement had brought on the immanent arrival of baby who, despite the eye-catching evidence of the swollen belly was not in fact due for three weeks!

Whilst we waited for her notes to be written up I stood and chatted with Alice. She held onto my hand and I tried in my way to reassure her. Truth to tell though, she was calmer than me, if perhaps a little excited that she was going to have her baby at last. We got on well, she told me all about herself and I responded in kind by telling her about me. We swapped tales of gardening and cooking and shared in the moment by being friends in what is after all a rather hostile place – A Hospital.

To get to the Labour Ward from A&E was quite a long trek. Corridors, lift up three floors, more corridors, a link-bridge to the Maternity Unit, another corridor, a lift down one floor and the final corridor to the Labour Ward itself… The warm coloured paintings on the wall, the soft music that played in the lobby area, the big-hearted laugh of the Ward Sister gave an immediate feeling of calmness as we wheeled Alice into room one. Light and airy with minimal furnishing it could have been cold and clinical but instead held an almost Zen approach and everyone breathed easier for being there. Sister Rose, who hailed from the West Indies had been in charge of the ward for more years than anyone cared to remember, she WAS the Labour Ward. All others bowed to her knowledge and common-sense approach to the delivery room.

Alice asked if I would stay. Her husband was a salesman and was somewhere in Leeds at the moment, though following a phone call he was more than likely to be halfway down the motorway by now; And she would appreciate the company and if I could hold her hand she would like that very much…

Despite her best intentions Alice did not have a good time. She screamed a lot during the delivery and despite the pain she had in here hands she crushed my fingers and swore a great deal. Sister Rose ignored it all and simply told her that all was well and told her when to push and when to relax and Alice tried hard to follow orders. She still uttered the occasional expletive though! And then all of a sudden there she was – Eve arrived. Her screams and protests far louder than her mothers. The wet hair on her head lay quite thick across her scalp and her wrinkled face creased even more as she bellowed her welcome to the world. Her pudgy little fingers groped as the midwife passed her to Alice who beheld the squawking bundle with delight and tears and pressed the tiny body to her bosom. The mouth that yelled soon became the mouth that suckled and silence, save for the heavy breathing from Alice soon overtook the room and the midwives left her to settle for a while.

Alice looked at me at smiled a weary smile. “I did it”, she said. “Thanks for staying.”

I sat with her for another hour. I held the baby in my arms while the midwives did their bit with Alice by washing her and changing her blood-soaked gown. All to soon it was time to leave because the bleep gave a signal that I was required elsewhere. We exchanged a hug and a kiss and said goodbye and I went about my job. I wondered how to write up the occasion in the Report book.

<<<>>>

I was on my way to the Canteen to grab a bite to eat. The day so far had been busy and I thought that if I grabbed a sandwich or, if they had any left, a baguette I could take it back and eat whilst I finished off one of the reports requested.

Outside the Pharmacy a whole host of people waited for prescriptions to be made up and I had to negotiate my way through the throng. My way was barred by an attractive, twenty-something, year old woman who stood foursquare in front of me. “Hello”, she said.

I looked and saw a complete stranger. Nevertheless, I said a rather brusque ‘hello’ in return and tried to step round her. She sidestepped and was still in my way. “You don’t know me do you?”, she asked rather unnecessarily. I had to admit that she was correct in her assumption. But then she asked me another question. A question that threw me a bit and I paid attention.

I listened to her question and it seemed harmless enough and truth to tell, I could use the event to take my mind off work. So I followed her as she led me across reception to meet her Mother as per the request.

The figure in the wheelchair had her head bowed so I could not see her features. But I could see that she was disabled by her twisted hands and feet. The younger woman spoke again. “Mum, I think I found her.”

‘Mother slowly twisted her head to one side and lifted her face to look at me and she smiled . “Hello Amanda.”

I tried to be calm and courteous but the puzzled look on my face gave me away and the woman laughed a delightfully musical laugh. “I suspect that you do not remember me. But I remember you.” Then she burst into song, the first line from Sgt. Pepper by the Beatles. “It was twenty years ago today.” And she laughed again. “You helped me make the world a better place. You stayed with me while I gave birth to the beautiful child beside you.” She indicated her daughter.

She went on at length about what a delight her daughter was to her and she had grown up into a wonderful woman and was good to her Mother. The girl blushed and muttered warm words of admonishment to her mother, she was obviously used it. I learned that Eve Cared for her Mother in almost every way because of the disabling disease that had reached far into her body and limbs. But the warm smile was always present, she smiled fondly when she told me of the passing of her husband and how the two of them had attended the funeral, Eve supporting her Mother as by now she walked unsteadily.

Mother went on, “I was a bit wrong singing that song you know. It was Twenty Two years ago actually. Twenty Two years ago, you and I shared a moment. Remember?”

And the years rolled away and I rubbed my hand at the memory of her vice-like grip.

HEY!

“Hey! You were working last night weren’t you?” I couldn’t deny it.

“Thought so.” He said without waiting for the answer. “I remember you outside when those louts came up to A&E. My Partner is just getting some paperwork from the Sister about it.”

His tall frame fitted out the uniform well and his boots shone. His radio made noises and he turned the volume down. “I suppose you do a week on nights then?” A glance back up the corridor to check his partner had not reappeared. He went on, “We do the same shifts. A week of early a week of lattés and a week of nights. You get used to it don’t you?” The merest hint of a pause, “We have brought another one in for you, but I don’t think he will be much trouble, he is too drunk. Do you think it will be a Home win for the footie on Saturday? I reckon it will mean trouble for us if we lose!”
I couldn’t help but wonder as to why he asked questions but did not wait for answers. I put it down to his youth and obvious eagerness that everyone should know he was a Policeman. I idly supposed that his eyes hid his own uniform from view.

“I better get on. Maybe I will see you later. You never know what the night will bring do you?” He turned on his heels and marched back up the corridor.

I resumed my way to the Path Lab, the specimen in the plastic bag had a limited shelf-life. I passed through Reception and down the corridor to the lab where the Technician waited and I handed over the bag.
“Keep them coming” He said, “I need something to keep me awake. Things are slow tonight.”

It was true. Sometimes it happened that way, nights got slow. Not that I minded, There are books to read, music to be heard and right now… food to be sought. Time for a raid.

If, upon being given a set of keys that in theory open every door in a Hospital, and one does not use them; it shows a certain lack of curiosity.
Which is an odd justification for being nosey I know, but I did use them and am pleased to report that I have at some point been in every single room in the Hospital. Further, I have, in my time, used every single, outermost, remote toilet. Even the ones in the accommodation block.

A small claim, but in the context of quiet night-shifts, a big deal. I once, and this is confession time, I once sat in the leather chair behind the desk of the Hospital Director and used his big mahogany desk to roll a very large joint which I subsequently shared with Duff up on the roof. I also rolled them in the Mortuary, the Canteen, a cubicle in the Maternity Ward and many other outlandish places. Including behind the reception desk in a busy Accident & Emergency, simply to prove to myself that people just don’t see what is going on under their noses. Though in that particular case I may have had my judgement clouded by the one I had rolled and smoked earlier in the evening.

In this instance having delivered the specimen I hastened toward the kitchen. When the munchies strike food suddenly takes on an urgency. It pays to know the right people no matter where you work. I had been left instructions – a note had been put in my locker. “On the right as you go in. Plated and ready to be zapped.” To the unknowing reader this would mean little - to me, as a friend of the Chef it meant a lot!

Gary was a dear chap, he had a liking for beer and the music of Jethro Tull, and was very tolerant to those that liked to smoke. I had happened to mention one night in the pub that I liked to crumble hash into an omelette… Not being one to miss a hint he had from that day forth whenever he was on the late shift and I was on nights, whipped up an omelette and sprinkled it with a liberal dosage of the aforementioned herb. He would wrap it in Clingfilm and place it in the fridge ready for me when I started nights. Friends in the right place see…?

I liberated the plate from the padlocked cooler and headed out into the canteen carefully locking doors behind me. Already eating at a table in the corner were two Doctors and a Staff Nurse. I made use of the Microwave and took my now steaming supper/breakfast across to join them, greeting each in turn.

The discussion they were engaged in concerned the forthcoming changes within the Hospital. It was inevitable, it would mean Big changes all round. Many of the Ancillary jobs within the newly-formed Trust would be palmed off to outside Agencies.

If I was to stay, then I would find myself working for a National Unified Workforce. I did not relish the idea and so had made plans to move. I was headed for the Switchboard, a department that was to stay under Trust control. My Portering days drew to an end.
All three of my supper companions agreed that it was a shame that the changes were going to happen, and we all agreed that no good would come of it. – Hindsight shows that this conversation proved to be prophetic.

Supper finished and the devilish delight of eating a herb-laden omelette in front of unsuspecting doctors and nurses added an extra zing to the effects the drug took.

The night took on a mellow outlook and I went out into the grounds to begin a so-called Security round. It so happened that the security clock had inexplicably broken down during my last set of nights and as yet had not reappeared from the menders. I momentarily had a thought that sand in the winding mechanism had obviously gummed it up nicely and a pang of guilt flashed through my mind, tho’ that thought didn’t last long.

In the far corner of the site sat an old house that now served during the day as a crèche. It was the garden that drew me and I wandered around it for a while, delighting in the moonlit flowers that glowed and the scents that some of them gave. I sat on the Troll Bridge – a small structure that spanned the tiny pond – and smoked a cigarette and let my bare toes dip into the cold water. The goldfish nibbled at my toes. Life was good.

I replaced my shoes and continued round the back of the accommodation blocks. Various lights showed that even at this late hour some were still awake. The sound of a radio played softly as I passed the Doctors Mess and through the window I could see a doctor pacing up and down, reference book in hand that he glanced at from time to time. Exams loomed for the Juniors and throughout the previous nights I had come across three or four Doctors similarly engaged up in the Library on the top floor of the Main Block.

As I rounded the topmost corner and started to head back I heard the sound of a window opening. I stopped to look and saw that someone was not letting in air, rather, he was letting himself. The dark clothing gave hint that this was not quite right, the screwdriver he held in his hand as he eased up the glass gave another clue. I edged back around the corner and let myself in through the fire door and ran down the corridor for the nearest phone.

The Police could not have been far away because they arrived within minutes and the driver made for the window when I pointed it out to him whilst the other followed me in to the block and I opened up the door to the room.

I stood back and let the Officer enter first, I followed from a safe distance and could see that the burglar had dumped a radio/CD player and television onto the bed and was unplugging a PC… As the lights went on he jumped and then started for the window at a run, the figure of the Policeman stood there framed by the darkness outside and he drew up and put up his hands.

Handcuffed, he was marched off. I closed the window and made sure the bolts were tight then closed the door behind me. Outside I was greeted by a familiar voice.

“Hey.” Said the voice and I groaned inwardly. “You think we got nothing better to do?” He at least had a smile on his face while he uttered the words. “I expect you thought that we would be at the station drinking tea?” He laughed at this uproarious joke and went on, “As it happens we will be now. Got to lock up the baddie you sent us.” He kicked a stone into the gutter. “See you again.” He waved a hand and returned to his car.

I thought that while I was out I would do another walkabout. It was all ammunition for the report book… But the joint I smoked on the round would remain unmentioned in that battered tome.

Back in the Lodge the rest of the crew had gathered and tea was being made. A time of talk and social gathering. – Sid tried to see if he could beat his record with the Rubik Cube he usually carried about his person. Geoff squinted at a newspaper, holding it close to his face and peering through myopic eyes. Andy was prodding fingers at his new computer and sat with a puzzled frown. I pressed go on the cassette player and lay back to relish in the music of Miles Davis. Geoff frowned at first but he was a musician (trombone payer in a Brass Band) and he soon began to appreciate the feel of the music. I was slowly educating him away from the stifled world of Classical music!!

Time passed, a few jobs came and went and we began to think about a few minutes of shut-eye. Geoff took himself off to stretch out on one of the reception seats. Andy chose the warm corner over by the pharmacy and lay down with his Walkman plugged into his ears. Sid just sat by the phone and his head fell forward to indicate that sleep had taken him. I decided on another toke.

I was on the roof watching the smoke dissipate into the night and beginning to feel the full effect of a well-loaded smoke when the bleep sounded. The job, upon enquiry when I climbed back through the Library window was to see if I could help find a runaway Patient from A&E.

Sister Hils explained; He was in jeans and T-Shirt, came in as an overdose and was waiting for the team to assemble to give him a washout. He came to and legged it up the corridor, so he is inside the Hospital somewhere. The Police are already here and having a look.

I felt a bit put-out by having Police running about in MY Hospital… nevertheless I set off in pursuit. I took the lift to the top and walked down the stairs checking for unlocked doors as I went and poking my nose into the Ward areas in case anyone had seen anything. I made it down to the 1st floor and was checking the admin offices that overlook the reception when I heard the, by now, familiar voice.
“Hey!”
I could have screamed.. I hate being called Hey. I checked the door at the far end of the balcony and made my way to the Policeman who stood looking down on the Reception.

“Hi again. We must stop meeting like this” The hearty laugh grated, and he stepped forward to face me, his young features all aglow with delight. He was here on Official business and lost no time in telling me so.
“We were passing and we got the call. So we headed in to see if we could help. I expect you need it.” A reply on my part was cut short. “I know it must be tricky for you to know what is going on in such a large area, so we will do what we can to find him.”

I resisted the urge to push him over the balcony. Instead I told him I had checked down from the top floor and had mostly finished this floor.
“Oh, never mind about that. This is a drug-crazy we are after here. Never know what they will do. But he should be easy to spot. People on drugs usually are.” His experience of life so far was going to be explained to me, I just knew it…

His radio crackled and he responded in the staccato voice that radio-users use. They had found the escapee outside on the main road heading for town. I was happy to hear it, I could get back to Miles Davis or maybe put on some Steve Hillage and let the night wash over me. PC Plod had other ideas. He was ready to regale me with facts and figures about life in Uniform and the drug-crazed persons he had met.

“It is easy to tell them you know..” A rare pause, and without thinking I asked why?.

“The eyes.” He explained looking straight at me. “Eyes give it away. Especially with Cannabis. The eyes go first and glaze over. It is easy to spot them after they have had a smoke. That, and the fact that most of them get violent.”

I nodded wisely accepting all he had to offer. “I think you ought to tell the Doctors, they could use this knowledge.”

He looked long and hard at me. “You know? You are alright. You got your head screwed on.”

I wondered at the man. I could not really believe in the somewhat surreal position of a Policeman telling a ‘Stoned’ Porter how easy it was to spot a drug user and totally failing to see one in front of him. I could only think of the one phrase. An old one it is true. Not original at all, but all that came to mind is – Aren’t our British Bobbies wonderful?

Ada

Ada Brooks was not so good on her feet any more but, the frame the hospital had given her since the hip replacement had enabled her to get out and about to a certain extent. Her other hip joint was not good but the Surgeons wanted to let the first op' mend before starting on it. In the meantime she was still just about able to shuffle her way up to the corner shop to fetch the evening paper.

She noted that the skies were getting a wee bit lighter – Spring would be here soon. Her late husband had liked spring, he used to say it made the sap rise; she smiled at the memory. It was he who had always fetched the paper every evening because it had the horse racing results. He had been fond of the occasional flutter on the gee-gees, and old habits had died hard. Now, once a week, she too made the short trip to the bookies to place a few pounds. She rarely won of course, she lacked her husbands knowledge of the horses. Nevertheless it brought him closer for a moment or two and that was something.

She was a little bit later than usual and she tried to hurry herself along. The frame and her hip limited her speed she soon discovered and she had to pause for breath.

She didn’t hear a thing. Not only that, she hardly felt a thing either; All she recalled afterward was a bright light exploding in her head and seeing the ground come up to meet her face. Mercifully she lost consciousness before her nose broke on the pavement.

The Police got to the scene in a very short time as did the Ambulance. A witness had called 999 and was on hand to say what had happened and give a description of the protagonist.

Thieving is bad enough; said the Policeman: Hitting and snatching a bag from a frail old woman was, he said, as low as anyone could get. Everyone within earshot could not disagree. Each of them hoped that the assailant was caught soon. Some voiced the opinion that he should be castrated and made to eat his own testicles… Again, no one could find fault with the idea.

Paramedics had patched her up at the scene. Because she had lost consciousness it was essential that she go to the Hospital to undergo a thorough examination. An X-Ray to her head being most important.

She held my hand tight as we wheeled the trolley into the X-Ray. She clung on to me while the Technician carefully rolled her to take the pictures of her hip and her nose. Both turned out to be broken.

She still held my hand when back in the cubicle and would not let go while the Doctors gave their verdict. I listened with her as they said that her hip was probably now beyond the repair that had been planned. Her nose would remain crooked because the bones had shattered and they could only do so much. My hand felt hers tighten and I watched as the tears rolled down her bruised cheeks.

Eventually the pain-killers they gave her kicked in and she fell into a troubled sleep…

With some difficulty on my part I reluctantly let go of her hand. Hilary, the Department Sister came in and laid a hand on my shoulder; She tried to tell me that it would be ok and Ada would be out of here in no time. She did her best to console me but the truth is, the more she tried the worse it got. I fled. I ran down the corridor and let myself out through the nearest Fire-Exit to take deep breaths of the cool night air and to dry my tears.

Mercifully a bleep saved me from myself. I pulled myself together and answered within a few moments.

For an hour or more I was kept occupied so had no time to dwell. By the time I got back to A&E things had got busy and the first thing Sister asked me was to take a chap in a wheelchair to X-Ray who had managed to spike his leg on a railing. He explained on the way as I pushed the chair; He thought he would show off to his mates in the park and hop over the fence. The fence was higher than he thought and he came down on it and the top of the railing pierced his leg. – It had too, blood soaked his jeans and still dripped. A trail showed the path we had taken. The cleaner shook her head in a very disapproving manner and followed behind with a mop. I wracked my brain, but could think of no park in the town that had railings. I have no idea why, but I smelled a rat…

As luck had it – I say luck, the fact is that it was a death; Whilst I was waiting in Radiology I was bleeped by Switchboard who said that the Police were bringing in a body and could I open the main gates? ETA, about five minutes. The X-Ray Technician handed me the films and I pushed the injured youth back to A&E and left him in a cubicle, searched out Sister, gave her the films and told her I would be back soon.

Death is something that one has to come to terms with. It happens. Part of the job is to deal with the ‘unseen’ part. The moving and handling that goes along with it. Relatives sometimes get to see their loved ones laid out and view the body with a sheet covering all but the face. They say their goodbyes and shed their tears and they leave with their grief often apparent. They do not give a thought to those that handle the body; and indeed why should they. Those that do it are there to do a job and there it ends. It so happens that those people are human just the same. Doing these things does have an effect, it is not always apparent, it is pushed away.

Ada had made a deep impression and I felt sadness rising as I made my way to the front gates. I opened them and gazed up and down the road but nothing could be seen yet so I headed to the Mortuary to prepare a tray from the fridge for the body. Opening up the office I made ready the Log book and pulled the property book from the draw. As soon as the Police and the Undertakers arrived I was ready and waiting and in short time we had done all the required administration and the body was put away in the fridge leaving only farewells to be made.

As the Police were there, I asked; Had they caught the guys who mugged Ada? One of the Policemen knew Ada in person because he had lived next to her as a kid. He immediately got on the radio to enquire how things were going.

The response told us that as yet nothing had been heard. I asked if they had a description and as the reply from Control came through with the details, I began to feel better about Ada. I ushered the Cops out of the Mortuary and requested they meet me in A&E. A few minutes later they drove their car out from the lower ground and I locked the gate and ran around the front of the building to meet them as they came across the car park.

Inside the Department I explained to them my theory which was of course based purely on gut-instinct. They, to their eternal credit went along with it; I took them to see the Sister in Charge. She gave me a hard look that I wasn’t sure how to interpret but was probably to do with Patient Confidentiality. I shrugged and just mentioned Ada. Hils came over all soft again and led the police to the cubicle that housed the rat I had smelled earlier.

They peeked in and conferred quietly. The spoke again with Sister. She spoke with the Doctor. He went and spoke with the youth. He followed this by speaking with Sister who spoke to a nurse who went into the cubicle and patched the guy up. The Doctor waited while this happened then he re-entered the cubicle and told the young man that he was able to go. He handed over a prescription for whatever medication he thought was right and discharged him.

As the youth limped his way out trailing his damaged leg two Policemen fell into step beside him and asked him if he would accompany them to their car as they wished to ask a few questions…. The panic showed in his eyes and he would have probably bolted but he realised that his leg was not going to co-operate.

An hour later I got a call. He had been arrested and charged.

The next call I got was from Hils in A&E – could I come and take Ada to the ward?

The moment I entered Ada smiled and said hello. She looked pale, the bruising on her face was severe and in truth it was awful to look at. She held out her hand and I took it in mine. She squeezed gently and uttered a thank you. She talked to me all the way up to the ward. She continued to chat as we transferred her from the hard trolley onto a comfortable bed. She carried on chatting as I helped push the bed into its place back in the Main Ward area. I held on to her hand throughout much of this time. I lost count of the number of times she said thank you to me. I really did try to explain that she should be thanking the Doctors and, more specifically, the Nurses; but she waved such ideas aside and she just patted my hand and said that I was the one.

Bill had accompanied me said he was going back to the ‘Lodge’ to sort out the rubbish round and would cover for me. He has a good heart has Bill. I gave him my set of keys and he took my bleep as well. I sat down with Ada and let her soft chatting and effusive gratitude wash over me.

It was a few minutes to six when Ada began to doze off. She would start a sentence then trail off for a moment until she woke herself to complete what she had to say. I could see that pain was beginning to get a hold of her. She kept wincing and uttered the occasional groan. It got worse and I pressed the button for assistance. She began to lapse in and out of consciousness, her hand relaxing and then tightening. Staff nurse appeared and took a look at her, she ran off and summoned the Doctor on call.

A moment of clarity for Ada came and she pulled my hand and whispered, Thank you.” Then she began to shake, the colour drained from her face completely and she cried out in pain. I yelled for the Nurse who was in fact already behind me. She threw back the covers and from the trolley she had wheeled up with her she grabbed a couple of paddles….

The voice I heard seemed to come from afar… - YOU HAVE TO LET GO!

The Doctor was prising Adas hand from mine. He shouted in my face. LET GO! Then, as the world came back to me and reality hit me in the eye I stood back and watched at another attempt to save a life.

Seen it all before, me. Been there, done that, I wear the T-Shirt.

But, sometimes; just sometimes there is something that gets caught in all the shrapnel that passes. Just occasionally we stand by as God puts out His hand and takes His own to Him.

Ada was His. She always had been. She had been given 70 something years here, but she was His. She told me that. She told me of her life. In the few short hours I knew Ada – she, a total stranger, touched my heart.